Read the
following before you do!
A management
consultant is someone who knows the Kama Sutra by heart, but does not know any
woman!
The
management consultancy scam:
How a
leading Management Consultancy Firm advised Swissair to use “Hunter Strategy”
to expand. This flawed strategy led to the bankruptcy of Swissair!
A scary
Swiss meltdown:
A nation
in shock: Swissair crisis
For
years, Switzerland
McKinsey’s airy platitudes bode
ill for its next half-century
http://www.ft.com/cms/s/0/9dbce952-38d7-11e4-9526-00144feabdc0.html
The
consulting firm, Monitor Group, provided research for a PhD thesis Colonel Gaddafi's
son Saif al-Islam submitted to the London School of Economics.
Monitor,
which had 1,500 employees worldwide, organized roundtables and produced studies
on stimulating business in Libya
At one
point, the firm proposed a mass-circulation book—for an additional price of
$2.45 million—that according to a Monitor memo would "allow the reader to
hear Gaddafi elaborate, in his own words and in conversation with renowned
international experts, his core ideas on individual freedom, direct democracy
vs. representative democracy, and the role of state and religion."
In
November 2012, Monitor was unable to pay its bills and was forced to file for
bankruptcy protection!
http://www.forbes.com/sites/stevedenning/2012/11/20/what-killed-michael-porters-monitor-group-the-one-force-that-really-matters/
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/education/education-news/gaddafi-son-plagiarised-his-degree-thesis-at-lse-2229620.html
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/education/education-news/gaddafi-son-plagiarised-his-degree-thesis-at-lse-2229620.html
Consultant Joke
A
shepherd was tending his flock in a remote pasture when suddenly a dust cloud
approached at high speed, out of which emerged a shiny silver BMW. The driver,
a young man in an Armani suit, Ferragamo shoes, the latest Polarized sunglasses
and a tightly knotted power tie, poked his head out the window and asked the
shepherd, “Hey! If I can tell you how many sheep you have in your flock, will
you give me one?”
The
shepherd looked at the man, then glanced at his peacefully grazing flock and
answered, “Sure.”
The
driver parked his car, plugged his phone into a laptop and briskly surfed to a
GPS satellite navigation system on the Internet and initiated a remote
body-heat scan of the area. While the computer was occupied, he sent some
e-mail via his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, nodded solemnly at the
responses.
Finally,
he printed a 150 page report on the little laser printer in his glove compartment,
turned to the shepherd, waving the report, and said “You have exactly 1,586
sheep.”
“Impressive.
One of my sheep is yours.” said the shepherd.
He
watched the young man select an animal and bundle it into his car. Then the
shepherd said: “If I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give
me back my sheep?”
Pleased
to meet a fellow sportsman, the young man replied, “You are on.”
“You are
a consultant” said the shepherd without hesitation.
”That is
correct,” said the young man, impressed. ”How ever did you guess?”
“It was
not a guess,” replied the shepherd. “You drive into my field uninvited. You ask
me to pay you for information I already know, answer questions I have not
asked, and you know nothing about my business. Now give me my back my dog.”
